How amazing is the E-Stim machine? Not knowing what you were doing but feeling strange, alien sensations on my pussy - regular and rhythmic, not really painful (although as I kept expecting pain I knew I was jumping a bit). Then realisation - electricity...hmmmm - TENS machine perhaps? Certainly not violet wand. Sharp feeling. Like you had a metal glove on with spikes but not painful. And then hilarity when you put it on my hand and the nerves just went into overdrive! I felt like a kid discovering how cool it is to fry ants with a magnifying glass. I love that you give me so many experiences that are novel. I'm 34, I feel like I've been there, tried that and got the t-shirt so to be starting again is just AMAZING.
Blow job with no hands. Desperately trying to please you as I sucked and choked, tears running down my face, my nose buried in your groin. And all the while you feeding dirty dirty thoughts into my head - going to make me give a room full of people a blow job with my hands tied behind my back. Because I'm so 'good' at it I have to service others. Standing up with the full force of how wet and horny I had become just through your words clearly obvious between my legs.
Playing in public. From an inauspicious start to raucous laughter, some choice language from me and now the results of a fantastic flogging coming to the fore on my back. Great great great to feel your knives on my back again. But painful - scrapy, sharp pointed pain as you went from left to right across my back. And all the time knowing that my short skirt, no knickers combo was clear for anyone to see. There were too many strange people in the club talking (Facility - I'm a Dominatrix, I have a card - thank you mistwess - loud orgasms) for me to drift away but in a way that made it better. And I was SO thrilled to be there with you and Eve, having a great experience from someone with so much knowledge of response and power. So the others became minor irritations rather than 'the general public'. Felt quite smug - almost superior (I know, sorry!) that there I was, sub to the most amazing man, almost giving a floor show to these poor newbies. ME?!!!! Just 1 year into my journey yet we were the prime attraction!!!
Being flogged. God you've let me off lightly in the past! Yes I'd felt some thumping, wind-out-of-my-lungs flogs with you before but nothing like the two of you letting rip on my back. Forgot completely about my crippling embarrassment of wearing just a pelmet and nothing else and concentrated on getting through it. Some amazing feelings - OW being the primary one but also - woooooohooo, how cool is this that they want to do this to me, I'm going to stand here and take it and 'wonder what on earth my back is going to look like tomorrow morning'. Loved every minute. Brilliant. And even Eve's apparent disregard that maybe I wasn't used to this level of impact made it wicked. Didn't even hug me or anything......! But you were there, big, calming presence, happy enveloping hug, grin and a chuckle. And then we laughed all the way home - me buzzing, you guys just analysing the other punters and being 'grown up' in a 'we understand play' way. Made me feel extra special.
Looking after you. Spending time thinking about what would make you happy - food, coffee, papers, ironing. I love it x
Socialising. My first munch! Wasn't quite what I expected but good to meet some fellow 'understanders', get a wee bit drunk with Eve and grope some poor girlies boobies. I kissed her too. On reflection, sober, maybe a mistake and apologies really - if it had been a bloke I had been snogging would it have been any worse/better/less of a crime. Got a bit carried away and I know you chuckled but sorry anyway xx
Going out dressed up wearing your collar - wow.
My D on my bottom. Hard carving, blood and care. And seeing it every time I drop my trousers. Thank you xxx
Sexual relief. When I was 'behind the times' all I thought about was sexual relief. Orgasms, even actually just being fucked. Boy does all that come (ha ha) down the list now. Adore making you come - the shake, the moans, the after effects - it fuels my desire so much. But my own sexual satisfaction is secondary or even tertiary to the act of submitting to you. Just pain in my breasts, or having my hair pulled and twisted, my head pushed, my throat held. A million times better than any sexual relief. I did have a minor panic when you held my throat for a mili-second longer than normal. "Do I really know this man? What the hell is happening?" Proper fear which of course is amazing in its own way. And you know me, are always checking and gauging my responses, keeping an eye on me which of course means I always feel utterly safe. Yes, I do feel you are moving me up the 'scale' but as you always say "when the time is right" and I totally believe that.
Laughs, friendship, just being. Amazing in its own way. Utter happiness.
And you left me the magic wand. GRIN. wondered if you would - you kept saying "you'll never get any work done" but then, tucked behind my pillow, the instrument of wonder. Made myself come a few times this afternoon after you had left. Relief. Nothing more really. Pressed my back into the mattress, feeling the knife and the scratch marks, remembering being in your arms and your control again. Nice. Not mind blowing but nice. Thank you.
I love you. I wish that we had more time together but to be honest, the time we have together is so meltingly perfect that I desire nothing more.
Thank you for everything and for making me smile as I write this post. I did have a massive sub drop between 10 and 12 today but now, I'm content again. Reliving the past few days, remembering everything we did. I start the week feeling closer to you than I ever have before.
I love you daddy xxxx
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