The scene

My journey had begun. I had tasted bondage, I had tasted forced orgasm and now I was literally champing at the bit for more. I wanted everything and I wanted it NOW.

I read online every web page, every forum, every blog I could find. I was repulsed by some (but my cunt still twitched), horrified by others and in awe of so so many of the submissives who are out there, living their fantasies, living their dreams. Once I get into this blog I will link to some of them (if I may) because it is they who are inspiring me to continue with this voyage.

Then I realised I wanted to participate in a scene. A formulated, organised scene. So I spoke to the Dom I played with on my first outing and we talked about my thoughts. Another woman would be fun, some bondage and lots of play!

I arrived at his house in the afternoon, a bundle of churning anticipation and nerves. But he had different ideas - we did nothing!! We sat and watched TV. We read the papers, we hardly talked about what might happen. He said he had arranged for a female friend to come round and how would I feel if when she arrived I was tied up, naked and bound? He said it so matter of factly I just nodded and said I'd like that ... I think.

And so I did. And it was fun - not as fun as I thought it was going to be. Crowded into my head were strange thoughts - jealousy as he fucked this other woman, confusion about what "our" relationship was all about, anxiety about what he was thinking, worries about my figure.

The Scene:
I was tied up in a seated position on a chair, blindfolded, impaled on a dildo with a magic wand tied to my clit. I was still smiling! It was fun, it was great, it was erotic up to a point. I loved feeling the rope around me - binding my breasts, making me feel so secure. Then the doorbell went - then another female voice, he and her talking about stuff - inconsequential stuff. Smoking, drinking with me tied up and vulnerable and open. I hate my body, I'm very aware that I weigh too much, that my tummy is too big. This was big for me - a big huge fucking deal. But I was coping with it. And enjoying it.

Then there came the sounds of a woman enjoying what I thought was an orgasm (but I know realise it is just that she is very noisy as soon as she is touched). Then I was untied, blindfold taken off and the lady was on her hands and knees, wrists tied to ankles bottom in the air. And the dom (A) said - "she's all yours" And I didn't know what to do but ploughed on!!!

I licked her, sucked her pussy, fingered her. The last time I'd touched a woman was when I was 13. She tasted sweet and slightly of perfume. I thought her pussy was beautiful looking - no hair at all (thank god) and it wasn't exactly a hardship playing with her. But it was a bit boring. I wasn't that into it. And I didn't feel directed enough by the dom - I was kind of left to my own devices a bit. We did share the wand which was great fun though and we both came very hard.

Then it just turned into a swingers session really in my eyes - sex and blow jobs but nothing more.

We chilled, had a glass of wine, talked.

Then he tied us together and she asked him to whip her. He used the crop on her bottom and her back while I leant into her - we were tied face to face, pussy to pussy, tits to tits. I hope I gave her some support as the blows rained down on her. She certainly gritted her teeth and appeared to love it but for me if was horrifying - first time I had been this close to corporal punishment and it really was a site to behold. And oh my god - when we were untied, the marks on her back and on her bottom were unbelievable.

I think they both realised it had been a revelation/distressing time for me because they both immediately asked me if I was okay and how I was feeling. We then all just sat and hugged on the sofa for a bit until it was time for bed. It was strange - all the way through my breasts had been bound and as soon as A. took off the ropes I felt naked and had to hide under a blanket. They had been acting as a comfort blanket, as clothing for me.

My overwhelming feeling as I drifted off into sleep was - that was quite a night - but it hadn't hit me (pardon the pun) quite like the first, almost innocent time of just being tied and made to come. Such a simple straightforward movement of wrapping the rope around my wrists and securing me had made me feel secure, had given me strength and trust.